2012年4月19日星期四

古德明: 體育節獻詞



問:第五十五屆體育節獻詞有一句很複雜,謹附上,先生可不可以把句子分成短句?

答:這一句不是複雜,只顯示了當局英文程度之低劣: Only then with such ambition at heart and such a project in hand that Hong Kong began to develop in spades various facilities to match the enthusiasm and enable more and more of its citizens to partake in sporting activities that before were outside their daily experiences that had been consumed with work and study at the detriment of other aspects of life。什麼叫做 experiences that had been consumed with work and study(被工作、學業耗盡的經驗)?也許,作者想說的是工作、學業一度耗盡市民精力,令他們無法參與體育活動,但增加了體育設施,市民就有精力、有餘暇運動了嗎?究竟作者知不知道自己在說什麼?

而句子文法更是一開始就錯了,以 only then起句,句子必須用倒裝文法( inversion),即動詞須置於主詞( subject)之前,例如: Only then did he realise his mistake=It was only then that he realised his mistake他這時才知道自己的錯誤)。又英文可以說 He worked hard, to the detriment(或 at the expense of other aspects of life(他努力工作,忽略了生活的其他事務),不會說 at the detriment。總之,無論意思還是文法,體育節獻詞那一句只可用「一塌糊塗」四字形容。作者想說的是什麼,各位自己猜吧,我無法翻譯,更無法改寫。